Poker
by Ginn
Summary: A game of strip Poker goes horribly arye **COMPLETE**
1. Default Chapter

POKER

A/N – I know that this is going to be an extremely odd short story right off the bat.  Actually this story is based on the oddest dream that I had.  

Disclaimer – I own nothing, except the plot, so don't sue.  

            Harry, Ron, and Hermione had all been sitting around the card table for about three hours.  All three of them were very bad at poker but they had been constantly playing it since Dean had told them about it taught them how to play.  

            Since all three of them were broke they were playing strip poker to make it more interesting.  They were all in various states of undress but they had all lost their robes, school sweaters, socks, and shoes.  

            "Okay show you're hands."

            "Wait Harry, Ron, I won!  I never win."  Hermione squealed.

            "Then how come you're still wearing so much clothing?"  Ron asked.

            "I was wearing more to start with.  I am female you know and I had accessories you know."  Hermione looked forlornly into the pile of clothes next to Ron, at her abandoned hair tie and wished that she still had it to keep her hair out of her face.  Her thoughts were rudely interrupted by Harry's voice.

            "Well what's our punishment."

            A malevolent grin appeared on Hermione's face.

            "Shirts," she said while arranging her small pile of clothing to add the shirts.

            Harry and Ron looked at each other and then back at Hermione.

            "But it's so cold in here," said Ron.

            In response Hermione raised one delicately arched eyebrow and looked at the two boys in anticipation.  Harry and Ron reluctantly removed their shirts and Harry involuntarily shivered.  

            "Much better," said Hermione as she surveyed the half naked boys.

            They played for a while longer and soon all Hermione had left was her skirt and a loose fitting white tank-top that she had worn under her shirt to guard against the cold of the potions room earlier that day.  

            "I win," Harry yelled, "Ron your class ring, and Hermione your tank-top."

            "Why can't you take my class ring instead of my tank top?"

            "Because Ron and I have been trying to avoid loosing our boxers for the past few turns and you still have a skirt and a top left."

            "I may but you two took my bra and underwear out from underneath them."

            "That's the point of strip poker you will loose clothing and eventually have none if you're bad at the game."

            "Well you two can keep your boxers I'm quitting."

            Hermione stormed out of the room.  

            Harry and Ron looked at each other and contemplated continuing the game without Hermione but halting the loss of clothing.

            "No," they said together.

            Harry and Ron got dressed and it wasn't until Ron couldn't get his sock to fit that they realized Hermione had left her clothes and Ron had been trying to put on Hermione's sock.  

            All the people left in the common room laughed at the sight of two seventeen year old wizards, stalking around, asking after Hermione, while carrying her clothing.  

            Finally they gave up and went to bed not realizing that Hermione had simply gone to her dorm.  

            Knowing that she had left her clothing in the boy's dorm she asked Lavender to assist her in a reconnaissance mission to go get her cloths back.  

            Around Midnight they put their plan into action and snuck into the boy's dorm they had just bagged up Hermione's clothing when they were both suddenly grabbed from behind.  Whirling around to face their captors they realized that they were Harry and Ron.  Just then McGonagall opened the door and stepped in, they had forgotten about the midnight bed checks.  

            "What on earth is going on here," she screeched when she saw Hermione and lavender in their skivvies in Ron's and Harry's arms, with a pile of women's clothing on the floor next to Hermione and Harry.


	2. Detention

Finally updating, my muse came back.  J

At the end of our last chapter we left our clothing nicking heroines like this.

"What on earth is going on here," she screeched when she saw Hermione and lavender in their skivvies in Ron's and Harry's arms, with a pile of women's clothing on the floor next to Hermione and Harry.

"Well Professor we were…um…anybody?" said Hermione, obviously not sure what to tell McGonagall.  

"I don't know what they're doing here Professor we heard noises and saw some people trying to take a bag of stuff out of our room in the middle of the night, we didn't want them making off with our stuff so we grabbed them.  We didn't know who it was, honestly." Ron looked as if he expected to die of embarrassment on the spot, "Just don't send an owl to me mum, please."

Harry started giggling and released Lavender long enough to allow himself to fall to the floor and start shrieking with laughter at the look on Ron's face.  

"What's going on?" mumbled a sleepy Neville.  

"Yeah what's all the racket about chimed in Seamus?" fully awake and staring curiously at Lavender in her skivvies.  

Dean also seemed interested in Lavender's skivvies but was smart enough to not say anything. 

"You three stay out of this," said McGonagall, "this matter is between Mr. Potter, Mr. Weasley, Ms. Granger, Ms. Brown, and myself.  You four if you would kindly follow me.  And for heavens sakes you two please put something on." She said this last bit to Lavender and Hermione who were snatching desperately at Hermione's clothes.  Hermione got her robes and Lavender got a sweater, so they both put them on.  

"McGonagall led the four of them to her office, seated them on opposite sides of the room, Ron and Harry on one and Hermione and Lavender on the other, went behind her desk and sat to face them.  

"Well?" she said expectantly, "Somebody please tell me what is going on."

Ron who looked terrified at the thought of telling McGonagall what had happened whimpered and sank back into his chair trying to make himself look smaller, and insignificant.  

"Oh fine I'll tell her what happened, "said Harry finally, and launched into the whole sorry tale.

"The only thing is, " said McGonagall when Harry had finished, looking very sheepish, "Is what Ms. Brown and Ms. Granger were doing in your room in the middle of the night?"

"If you please," said Lavender slowly "we were just trying to get Hermione's clothes back from, those two," She said gesturing at Ron and Harry.  

"Well then if that is all, I must give all four of you detention, and Hermione you will receive two, not only because you participated in a game that is against school rules, but because you were also out of bed after lights out, and in the boy's dorm no less.  I expect better of all of you, please don't let it happen again.  You will receive owls at breakfast concerning your detentions.  Now I suggest that you all go to bed, in your own dorms."

As the four of them walked dejectedly back to Gryffindor tower Lavender suddenly perked up.  

"Hey, can I play with you guys next time?"

"Sure," said Hermione, "How does next Thursday sound?"

"Great," said everybody.  And they all went to sleep a bit more cheerful than they had been before.

FIN

A.N. - That's it, it's open ended though so I might do another one, but I also might not, oh well.  Hope you enjoyed.  Thanks to those who reviewed.  

I Await Your Flaming Tomatoes 


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